Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Random Ramblings

I feel like I have so much to catch you up on, so I know that this post will be full of rambling!!

First to all of you, thanks so much for praying for me as I went to Boston. It couldn't have been a more enjoyable time. We were able to accomplish so many things, and we left feeling like we had helped to further our cause and educate doctors more about mastocytosis. Our time together was fun and I've never laughed so hard!! With varying personalities, I would never have guessed we'd get along as well as we did - but we did!! My flights were fine, and on my return trip, I was feeling like a pro at it!! I realized that sometimes the worst part of something we are dreading, is the actual fear itself. Once you push past the fear, you usually find yourself in an amazing place. And that was the case for me. I cannot tell you how many times I was so aware of God's hand in our trip. That was an awesome experience for me. Things that should have set us back, only pushed us forward to better things!! So, it was a great trip and I really do appreciate your prayers and support.

On my return flight, I had a wait at the airport for about 5 hours before my flight leaving Boston. I spent that time working on my Beth Moore bible study, so I was pretty immersed in it. When they started boarding my flight I noticed this young army soldier with his mom and dad. They were hugging and the mom started to cry. The young, brave soldier, looked at her, and said, "Don't you start it Mom. We are not going to cry." Well...she held her sobs, but the tears were gently flowing. I happened to be right beside this young guy as we were heading onto the plane, and the quiet tears his mom was shedding, became loud sobs from him. I was so moved. I refrained from reaching out and hugging him right there, but that's what I wanted to do. I looked at him and told him that I appreciated his service to our country (he was going to Korea for a 20 month tour), and that he would be in my prayers. It so reminded me of the sacrifice these men and women are making for our country, so when you think of the soldiers, remember this guy and pray for him.

I mentioned above moments where I felt God was orchestrating my circumstances, and the soldier experience was one of those moments. Anytime I think of men and women serving our country I think of their sacrifice mainly because of Rob (brother-in-law) serving in Iraq and our friend Lee Henry. And it really moves me. But also because new friend, Mrs. Kay Bonner (from my Bible study) has shared her son's story with us. Everett - her son, is serving now in Iraq as a surgeon with the National Guard (I believe that's correct). He has a family and small children and we have been praying for him since the beginning of my Bible study. So...not only was I able to pray for this soldier I have never met, I was able to pray for Mrs. Kay's son in a new light. It was a God inspired moment for me. So, please also remember Everett in your prayers.

I have a lot of prayer requests today.

Today, I am wearing a bead bracelet with 4 beads on it that I made as a prayer bracelet. My friend Beth Stogner will be going to India this week with a group from her church First Baptist Covington on a medical mission. The 4 beads represent my prayer for her, her family, her team, and the people of India. Beth shared her testimony with our MOPS group last week, and it is an amazing testimony. Beth has 4 boys, and her son Sam was in Madison's class at St. Timothy's for 3 & 4 year preschool. As any mother would feel, leaving her children is a source of fear. She told the following story and I know she won't mind me sharing her great story of how God answered her prayer.

Approached with the decision to go to India, Beth said her immediate response was "No way! but...I'll pray about it." Well...how many of us have said that same thing, knowing good and well, that the answer was NO. Beth said she felt the same thing, but that over the months that she was praying about it, she began sensing God's nudge toward India. One of the weeks that she was praying about this trip, her husband Tom left the iron on in the house 2 times in one week. Knowing that she would have to leave the 4 boys with him while she was gone, she said she called him at work, and asked him, "How am I going to go to India if you keep leaving the iron on?" So..he told her they would buy an iron with an automatic turn off. Okay, well, that solved that problem. BUT...her boys like toaster strudels and pop-tarts for breakfast each morning, and they don't have a toaster - she just uses the broil option on the oven. She said now she was worried about him leaving the oven on while she is gone and burning the house down. Something else for her to worry over. (She needed a toaster!)

So later in the next few weeks...she and her husband went to something at the church, where they had a bunch of door prizes that you could enter your name to win when you entered the room. She entered her name and her husbands, and she said the table was filled with gift certificates to spas, and things like that, but the shiny double toaster was what caught her eye. She said, at the moment she saw the toaster, she knew she was going to win!! So, she sat and listened to the speaker, and at one of the bathroom breaks, she went up to the table to view the door prizes. She was talking to a friend of hers, and told him, that she knew she was going to win the toaster. He was holding some cards in his hands, and asked her, "What if I told you that you won a door prize?" She asked excitedly, "I did?" So, it comes time for him to read the names to everyone and hand out the prizes, and guess what....Beth Stoger - WINNER OF THE TOASTER!! Beth said she ran back to her husband and shouted, "I'm going to India!!!"

This was just one of the examples she shared of the many where she KNEW God's answer for her was to go to India!

God speaks to us, and shows us our answers if we ask Him and listen!! For some it comes in a scripture verse, for others a conversation we have with a friend, for others a sermon on Sunday morning, and then for others, a TOASTER!! However God speaks, we should listen!! Beth will be leaving the end of the week for a 10 day trip to India. Despite her fears and anxiety, she is following God's will for her life. Please remember her in your prayers as she goes!! (I should add that she has full faith that her husband will take care of her 4 boys, she just will miss them, as she's never been away from them for this length of time!!)

What are you seeking God's will for? We don't have to be going on a mission trip, or to a war to serve our country. But wherever we feel God leading, there is bound to be anxiety, and "out of our comfort zone" kind of fear. I pray that wherever you feel God leading you, or to whatever situation you are seeking His will...that you will find Him!! When we ask, God delivers!

Dear Heavenly Father,
Today I pray a special prayer for Beth as she prepares to go to India later in the week. Give her Your peace and protection. Bless their ministry and the people that they will be ministering to. Lord I also pray a special pray for the men and women who serve our country. What a tremendous sacrifice they and their families make for us!!
I love you, Amen.

Matthew 7:7-8, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."

Monday, October 6, 2008

I'm going to Boston...

I keep finding myself having to go back to my post "Traveling Light" for a few reminders, in preparation for my trip coming up on Thursday.

For those of you who don't know, I am going to Boston on Thursday to the American Academy of Pediatrics Conference, along with 3 other ladies, to represent Mastokids.Org. I am very excited about this trip, but it's my first "big girl" trip since having my girls, and so I am a little anxious about leaving them for 4 nights.

Let me just say, I am leaving them in capable hands, I know Grant will do a wonderful job... of getting to Columbia as fast as he can so that the grandmothers' can help out!!! (Seriously, I know they will be fine.)

Especially with my two page color-coded list for each girl with specific instructions on what to pack for lunch on Monday, and what to include in their school bags, what to take to the grandparents, how many diapers to put in the diaper bag...etc. etc. etc. (I know they will be fine).

Yes...I do know they will be fine. And I have to keep reminding myself that though I am not going to be in control...they still will be fine. I really, honestly, have full confidence in leaving them with Grant because he is such a wonderful father, but it's just that feeling of being out of control.

That same feeling of being out of control, makes me worry for no reason about the flight and my safety, or being in a place I've never been before with 3 ladies I've never actually met. Or to worry obsessively about whether to pack so that I can carry-on my luggage, or check my bags - because if I carry it on, then I have to worry about whether I can lift my luggage up to the overhead compartment or if I'm going to have to bother a stranger to help (Yes...I actually voiced this concern out loud and Grant was none too thrilled! He thinks I'm crazy! And maybe I am, but my friend Lori (thank-you Lori), actually was concerned for me over the same exact thing!) One thing I can promise you though, is whether I carry it on or not, I will not have too much luggage, and I am planning on wearing flats!! [Learned that on the cruise, or more specifically, exiting the cruise down that long winding ramp!]

Today, as I was doing a test drive with my packing, to see how things would fit, I found myself worrying about what kind of panties to take in case my bag gets to be the one that's searched. Do I bring the cute brightly designed Victoria's Secrets or the no-wedgie Hanes Her Way, that are much more comfortable? [I hear you, I'm insane, but I just don't want my underwear spread out all over the conveyor belt for all to see! But, if it is...I've got to decide which kind will look cuter! (on the conveyor belt...I know, it's ludicrous)]

So, while I am doing all of this irrational thinking, I know that no matter what, I am going to be fine, my girls are going to be fine, and Grant is going to be fine. It's all fine!! And I know this because God keeps telling me to trust in Him. He is telling me to hand it over, give up this need for control.

I don't have any grand revelations in this post tonight, but I am just asking that you will pray for me as I go. I am so excited about the opportunity to make a difference for children living with mastocytosis as Audrey is, and I am thrilled to meet the people in person that I've been working with over the internet and by phone for almost a year. These are the things I keep reminding myself of.

I am so glad that God will listen to my worries as crazy as they are, and provide me with the peace that He is going with me on this trip. I don't know if He cares that much whether my luggage is on the plane with me, or if it is fine with Him that I send my luggage on a trip of its own and hope it makes it to Boston by the time of my arrival. And I am pretty sure He has no opinion on the panty thing!....BUT, I KNOW He wants me to know that He is going with me. And that provides me peace and protection!

I leave on Thursday and will return on Monday - so if you think of me (maybe when you are choosing your panties for the day), say a quick prayer for me. I would greatly appreciate it!!

Dear Heavenly Father,
I know that it is crazy some of these little things that I have worried over. I know they seem silly and they are. I also know that on a bigger scale I want things to be fine with my girls and Grant while I am gone. I want my travel to and from to be smooth and safe. All of these things, Lord, I know will be fine, because You are going with me. It is such a relief when I think, that while I am traveling to Boston by myself, that I am not really ever alone. You are always with me. Thank you for the promise that You will always protect me and watch over me. Thank you that when my fear enters, You are bigger than that fear. You will always be with me.
I love you, Amen.

Psalm 121:1-2
"I lift up my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth."

Psalm 121:7-8
"The Lord will keep you from all harm - he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore."